Jabba The Pie

When people tell you who they are, Maya Angelou famously said, believe them. However, when people try to tell you who you are, don’t believe them.

But when they keep calling you “cutie pie” even though you don’t really know them, forget Maya and believe nothing but your own pie.

You see, life is like a pie contest. You are the chef of your integrity pie and the assumptions made by those that misunderstand who you are and what you stand for reveal a great deal about their pie and absolutely nothing about your pie.

So this is my pie; it’s a flinty pie. Sometimes a persnickety pie. You might call it Jabba the pie; it slightly differs from your expectation pie, but something tells me you like it more than a “cutie pie”; -because after all, we are all complex pie. And it’s okay pie.

Why Jabba? Well, why not? I always had a thing for chubby creatures, regardless of what they look like. We know that he is a bad guy, but to me, he is so cute and chubby with his big belly filled with secrets. I just wanna cut them open and see what’s inside.
Sheperd’s pie is from the UK, and it’s supposed to be a meat pie. But mine is a vegan pie, because when I went to the UK for the first time and discovered Sheperd’s pie, there was no vegan Shepherd’s pie and that made me a sad pie. So I made my own pie.

I know this pie is not a socially accepted pie; -it’s a “shepherd’s pie” but no meat, and it’s got a fat creature on top of the pie. But if you are like me, you find this pie absolutely cute and delicious, with a hint of gnawing doubt. *wink!*

1: Boil the potatoes.
Peel all the potatoes and cut them into 3cm cubes. Prepare a pot half-filled with cold water, add the sliced potatoes and stir in 3 tablespoons of salt. Bring it to a boil, then reduce the heat to medium-low and let it gently simmer until they are soft. It should take about 10-15 minutes.
2: Prepare the ingredients.
Cut all the veggies into small pieces and boils the lentils for 15 minutes and strain. Prepare all the wet ingredients; -red wine, tomato puree, and vegetable stock.
3: Start the actual cooking.
While the potatoes are boiling, start making the pie mixture. Use a large non-stick frying pan and preheat it to medium-high heat. Then add the chopped garlic and fry them until they turn yellow. 4: Add onions, carrots, and mushrooms.
First, add the onions, carrots, and mushrooms together with a pinch of salt and pepper. Wait until the onions turn light brown and the carrots become tender, it should be about 10 minutes.
5: Add the rest of the veggies.
Add the boiled lentils, cut tomatoes and cut okura and mix it well.
7: Add flour.
To make your pie taste more gravy-like, add just a little flour. I added around 2 tablespoons, but you can add more if you like the mixture to be thicker.
8: Add the wet ingredients and herbs.
This is the most fun part! Add one cup of vegetable stock, half a cup of red wine, half a cup tomato puree and finally 1 tablespoon each of dried thyme and rosemary. Mix it well for a couple of minutes and as a result, your kitchen will smell wonderful!
This is what the final mixture should look like. Such beautiful colors of vegetables altogether, it looks so somatic to me; the color of nature. Put this aside while you make the mashed potatoes.

9: Make mashed potatoes. 
Get the potatoes out of the pot and drain the water. Add a tablespoon of salt and 2~3 tablespoons of soy milk, then use a masher to mash the potatoes. Don’t add too much moisture, because you don’t want a runny Jabba!

You can also preheat the oven to 400F/200C around this time. 
10: Make the Jabba-base.
Prepare a plastic wrap and start forming the shape of Jabba on it. Make sure you have a picture of Jabba nearby so it can guide you on how to shape his body. Have lots of fun making this and don’t try to be perfect. This is what I ended up with, it looks pretty close doesn’t it?11: Finish the rest of the mashed potatoes.
Add half a cup of soy milk and 3~4 tablespoons of vegetable stock to your mashed potatoes. By adding more moisture it gets easier to spread it on top of the pie.12: Put it all together.
Pour the pie mixture into a pie plate and spread the mashed potatoes on the surface.
13: Put Jabba the Hutt on top.
14: Bake for 20 minutes.
Your oven should be preheated 400F/200C by now. It’s time to bake Jabba till he turns into a golden Jabba.

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After 20 minutes…

Tada!! My Jabba is nice and golden, with a bit of brown spots on the edge. Smells so amazing!
15: Start making face.
For his facial parts, I used thinly cut dried seaweed. wet entire strings of seaweed and start making the face on Jabba. If you don’t wet the seaweed, it won’t stick to his face.For Jabba’s green parts, I used matcha powder. Wet a spoon and dip into the powder, then gently start painting Jabba’s surface using the back of the spoon. 16: DONE.
Afterward, sprinkle some cute green onions and freshly ground black peppers, and you are done. You just made the Jabba the Pie, all vegan.
Shepherd’s pie is a classic British dish and every Brits I’ve met has their own way of making it. And this is my way, my Shepherd’s pie.

The flavor of thyme, tomato sauce, and red wine; they make this pie absolutely an unforgettable pie. I hope you try it, with or without Jabba.

Thanks for reading.
-Yuki